Self-doubt is, in simple terms, double mindedness. It is the thing that prevents you from taking initiative because of fear of failure.
Self-doubt is a product of the negative messages you received in your childhood, the result of past failures and fear of the unknown. The operative w ord here is in the past. However, though these memories are in the past, the sting is felt today.
EXAMPLES OF SELF-DOUBT
Doubting your worth – whether you are good enough. Painful experiences from overly critical parents who are never satisfied. Nothing you do is good enough; there is always a flaw discovered or some aspect that could be improved upon. You don’t learn to view the product of your actions through eyes of success or completeness. Instead you feel like you aren’t good enough yet. This shows up in adulthood where at work you watch others advance having done what you consider was mediocre work or effort. You judge their results but you didn’t take that chance to expose yourself because you weren’t perfect enough yet. Another painful experience comes from overly aggressive peers who teased you, bullied you or humiliated you.
Doubting you can do what needs to be done. For example, a football or volleyball coach who used negative motivation to inspire the team, and benched you when the stakes got high because they wanted to win the game more than play the game. Their fear was inferred upon you and you adopted the belief that you could not be trusted to come through in all situations. There was a big chance that you might mishandle the opportunity. You might drop the ball or let it get by you or not get the hit or let someone hit off you. This fear of failure has translated over into other areas of your life.
Doubting you can handle yourself. Painful experiences from being manipulated controlled or betrayed by members of the clergy. Attending a church that continuing preaches fire and brimstone messages. Sharing your struggles with someone you thought you could trust and finding that you are now being watched, judged, treated drastically different or worse having those secrets exposed instead of encouraged or supported.
With experiences like these why wouldn’t you have self-doubt? Who could blame you for second guessing yourself and wanting to play it safe? You’re not alone; many other people do seek to protect themselves for painful experiences and hold themselves back.
SELF DOUBT HAS ADVANTAGES AND DISADVANTAGES.
The opportunity in self-doubt is that you have your own personal bodyguard. Imagine that, someone who is continually on the lookout for you watching for trouble and automatically taking action against perceived threats and minimizing risks.
So you are not alone and left helpless, however, to reach goals you are going to have to take risks. This will require that you disarm your bodyguard. So how do you do that?
Before I tell you how to do that, let me share some of the consequences of not taking that action.
Damages of self-doubt;
Self doubt makes decisions for you
FREE eBook Gift for Signing Up
Get Your FREE eBook
Subscribe to Robert's mailing list and get a FREE eBook offer.
Thank you for subscribing.
Something went wrong.